Mellow drama tic
means the Holidays are here:
Holler days,
the same sick feeling in the same stomachs.
Tree's up late,
Falling for decorations.
Snow's been great,
creating the anti-sensation.
Thinking of last year,
and the one before that.
By Surprise. We were getting
gone, founded, far away and near.
Friends and family confusing roles (or are they reversing?):
Less is more and a lot is belittled.
Perspective shot, innards sprawled
through the mouth. Nothing new, I've thrown up before but
the shakes they
always
get me and my
sleep
Monday, December 21, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
"We were like strangers who knew each other very well"
I've woken up every day for the past week feeling weird. Each of those days I had weird dreams. Not bad or nightmarish, not good, but elicit of the most bizarre feelings possible. They're the kind that make you feel just a little bit off for at least part of your day, if not all of it.
On top of that, I'm an anxious person. Sometimes, really anxious. As a result I've also had that nauseous worrisome feeling; the one where you feel like you're going to throw up and you're just waiting for the event to happen that triggers it, be it bad news, seeing the wrong person with another wrong person, doing shitty in class, whatever. It's been awful, and there hasn't been one damn saving grace to snap me out of it.
I put together a few loose-but-related ideas tonight at Scotto's. I really think it came out well. But past the writing, I don't know what to think. It's to the point where recognizing these things isn't enough anymore. Something's gotta give.
Right?
----------
"We Were Like Strangers Who Knew Each Other Very Well"
If I knew I'd been drinking from a powder keg,
I would've left my musket at home.
It's largely inaccurate anyway,
And, without the fanfare, more easily up I could blow.
Maybe if I did it in my sleep all my emotional sheep would follow
Some misguided, veiled dream on a long walk
Off a short cliff, with a riff, screaming hollow
Screams that'll drown out all the moments at which I'll balk.
If I had known to do this ahead of today
I would have left my watch somewhere I can't find.
It's largely inaccurate anyway,
And I needn't have wasted all this rhyme.
Maybe if there were a reason,
And for whatever reason that one may be,
I could stand mutual amongst time without desires that are treason
Instead of weighing it on top of me.
On top of that, I'm an anxious person. Sometimes, really anxious. As a result I've also had that nauseous worrisome feeling; the one where you feel like you're going to throw up and you're just waiting for the event to happen that triggers it, be it bad news, seeing the wrong person with another wrong person, doing shitty in class, whatever. It's been awful, and there hasn't been one damn saving grace to snap me out of it.
I put together a few loose-but-related ideas tonight at Scotto's. I really think it came out well. But past the writing, I don't know what to think. It's to the point where recognizing these things isn't enough anymore. Something's gotta give.
Right?
----------
"We Were Like Strangers Who Knew Each Other Very Well"
If I knew I'd been drinking from a powder keg,
I would've left my musket at home.
It's largely inaccurate anyway,
And, without the fanfare, more easily up I could blow.
Maybe if I did it in my sleep all my emotional sheep would follow
Some misguided, veiled dream on a long walk
Off a short cliff, with a riff, screaming hollow
Screams that'll drown out all the moments at which I'll balk.
If I had known to do this ahead of today
I would have left my watch somewhere I can't find.
It's largely inaccurate anyway,
And I needn't have wasted all this rhyme.
Maybe if there were a reason,
And for whatever reason that one may be,
I could stand mutual amongst time without desires that are treason
Instead of weighing it on top of me.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Stymied mind, irregular updates...
...this is what college does to you.
Praise Edison
Functioning well. Prey, do tell...reacting better. If no one else will I can. More than a matter of taking a stand. On soap boxes of maturity, I'll probably never come down. Playing to my shrinking audience. Auditing myself, working backwards inwards to see where I sold this (to myself), doing anything to not sell out. The irony is where I haven't ironed out the wrinkles, assuming everyone will remember. Asking for a revisionist history though, worth stowing away only for posterity theatrics. Not as enlightening anymore because I've seen light before, but the electricity is still flowing. Everyone, together now, praise Edison, the light bulb hasn't been jettisoned.
Praise Edison
Functioning well. Prey, do tell...reacting better. If no one else will I can. More than a matter of taking a stand. On soap boxes of maturity, I'll probably never come down. Playing to my shrinking audience. Auditing myself, working backwards inwards to see where I sold this (to myself), doing anything to not sell out. The irony is where I haven't ironed out the wrinkles, assuming everyone will remember. Asking for a revisionist history though, worth stowing away only for posterity theatrics. Not as enlightening anymore because I've seen light before, but the electricity is still flowing. Everyone, together now, praise Edison, the light bulb hasn't been jettisoned.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Greetings from the Catalina Wine Mixer
This comes into my head every time I'm outdoors. It's short.
Greetings From The Catalina Wine Mixer
Something about the woods makes me feel
So very nice to be here again
I wish I could stay forever
Instead of just now and then
Greetings From The Catalina Wine Mixer
Something about the woods makes me feel
So very nice to be here again
I wish I could stay forever
Instead of just now and then
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Reading into Sleep
This is about piecing together a puzzle someone else doesn't care for.
Reading into Sleep
Got hung up on a call I never made
The phone was only in my hand
The dial tone got closer to my ear
Went to punch the numbers, but you punched your words instead
We can go for long drives
You can take the keys
Go wherever you want
I'll just catch the Zs (I always fall asleep)
Got hung up on highway I never rode
The story's all the same
Got in the car to make the drive
But you stood out like a big stain
Clocked in, uninterested
Like an intro chapter to a book
Put me down on the table
Cause why read when you can just look?
Got hung up on nail heads I never hit
I don't even own a hammer
I thought I did ok though
But I wound up on the ground, slipped down as a steady stammer
So read me like a book
Drive me like a car
I don't care what you do
As long as you're who you are
Read me like a book (your favorite)
Drive me like a car (your maverick)
I don't care what you do
As long as you mean what you are
Reading into Sleep
Got hung up on a call I never made
The phone was only in my hand
The dial tone got closer to my ear
Went to punch the numbers, but you punched your words instead
We can go for long drives
You can take the keys
Go wherever you want
I'll just catch the Zs (I always fall asleep)
Got hung up on highway I never rode
The story's all the same
Got in the car to make the drive
But you stood out like a big stain
Clocked in, uninterested
Like an intro chapter to a book
Put me down on the table
Cause why read when you can just look?
Got hung up on nail heads I never hit
I don't even own a hammer
I thought I did ok though
But I wound up on the ground, slipped down as a steady stammer
So read me like a book
Drive me like a car
I don't care what you do
As long as you're who you are
Read me like a book (your favorite)
Drive me like a car (your maverick)
I don't care what you do
As long as you mean what you are
Maybe I'll Make My Way
This started on a napkin in Scotto's.
Maybe I'll Make My Way
Maybe I'll make my way to
Maine or Colorado maybe
I will or I won't I don't know
I maintain it's nothing against
This place But it's something about your face
And the way I trace how you used to care
With my fingers popping on my keyboard
How you swore you meant what your mouth had blared
...nothing more.
[I will or I won't I don't know
But I maintain it's nothing against]
This old school of thought: Friends means forever
Where teachers lament like broken records
Where the concrete halls serve as refreshers
To never heel but get well, nothing more
[I will or I won't I don't know
But I main it's nothing against]
How we walked through each other's footprints,
No matter the difference in shoe size
Managed to contain this in two year stints
Or how none of us see this as a surprise
Maybe I'll Make My Way
Maybe I'll make my way to
Maine or Colorado maybe
I will or I won't I don't know
I maintain it's nothing against
This place But it's something about your face
And the way I trace how you used to care
With my fingers popping on my keyboard
How you swore you meant what your mouth had blared
...nothing more.
[I will or I won't I don't know
But I maintain it's nothing against]
This old school of thought: Friends means forever
Where teachers lament like broken records
Where the concrete halls serve as refreshers
To never heel but get well, nothing more
[I will or I won't I don't know
But I main it's nothing against]
How we walked through each other's footprints,
No matter the difference in shoe size
Managed to contain this in two year stints
Or how none of us see this as a surprise
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
so unintentionally, when talking to brian a few minutes ago, i realized that when i'm completely alone with my thoughts for a few days, i feel like i start to get things
and understand them
but that as soon as i bring outside things into it- other people, other surroundings, responsibilities...
it all just goes to shit again
so the question that begs is not will i ever be able to make sense of this world
or my world, on a regular basis
but can i do it, get this understanding down of the combination of the two, that i have to deal with for every day left in my life.
---
I wrote that on June 26th, 2007. Two+ years later and I'm astonished, because I feel I'm the exact opposite now. I'm fine when I'm around people, but when I have time to myself, especially days at a time, that's when things get screwed up.
Frankly, it sounds like I made a whole lot more sense then.
So did everything else.
I'll have something new up in the next day or two. You know, something actually relevant to the purpose of this thing.
and understand them
but that as soon as i bring outside things into it- other people, other surroundings, responsibilities...
it all just goes to shit again
so the question that begs is not will i ever be able to make sense of this world
or my world, on a regular basis
but can i do it, get this understanding down of the combination of the two, that i have to deal with for every day left in my life.
---
I wrote that on June 26th, 2007. Two+ years later and I'm astonished, because I feel I'm the exact opposite now. I'm fine when I'm around people, but when I have time to myself, especially days at a time, that's when things get screwed up.
Frankly, it sounds like I made a whole lot more sense then.
So did everything else.
I'll have something new up in the next day or two. You know, something actually relevant to the purpose of this thing.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
This one's all Steve's fault
While at the Palace tonight Steve subtly asked what was up with SM's goings-on. I couldn't really tell him anything because there wasn't anything to really tell. But I came home and tried to feel through what's below. It's longer than I anticipated (that's what she said), but I'm happy with it. And, even though I use "him," and "he," it's not directly about him.
(As a quick aside, I don't think I'll ever give as much credit to what runs through everyone's heads. Or mine at least. I'm always surprised with how many words I can actually spill on something when I write it out instead of just leaving it to float in an idea bubble in my head...I just assume everyone is this way.)
End Act I (Intermission), Prepare for the Second
3am, clever words are blurred
Empty outside: crickets' chirp
It used to mean to much to know what's up
It used to be affluent, abrupt was unheard of
And I'll be down a couple stories 'cause I won't hear them for months
That's all I want-- something in the foreground
White noise annoys me when it's the only sound
Nuance: doesn't realize the feel of this place when he's not around
But he's not to blame, knows it's not the same
Comes back to it waiting, still knows his name
Leaves out the duster to take to the picture frames
When he goes they all do
From blue skies to eyes skewed
Put back some pieces each visit used to peruse
Healthy skin to palish grin
Nervous sweat but better yet
Limbs are reaching further, yes
I'll act as the heart to be the keeper
I'm staying here 'cause I've never been a leaper
Just keep in mind you keep things neater
I'll do the best I can to keep an even keel
Write you updates so you know this is real
Lest you know not when nothing feels good but when nothing feels
-----------
I've gotta stop this going to bed at an outrageous hour thing. It's not workin out too well. Remember to keep your bananas open and eyes peeled for more updates soon (because hopefully, for my sake, I'll stop being a stupid and update more).
(As a quick aside, I don't think I'll ever give as much credit to what runs through everyone's heads. Or mine at least. I'm always surprised with how many words I can actually spill on something when I write it out instead of just leaving it to float in an idea bubble in my head...I just assume everyone is this way.)
End Act I (Intermission), Prepare for the Second
3am, clever words are blurred
Empty outside: crickets' chirp
It used to mean to much to know what's up
It used to be affluent, abrupt was unheard of
And I'll be down a couple stories 'cause I won't hear them for months
That's all I want-- something in the foreground
White noise annoys me when it's the only sound
Nuance: doesn't realize the feel of this place when he's not around
But he's not to blame, knows it's not the same
Comes back to it waiting, still knows his name
Leaves out the duster to take to the picture frames
When he goes they all do
From blue skies to eyes skewed
Put back some pieces each visit used to peruse
Healthy skin to palish grin
Nervous sweat but better yet
Limbs are reaching further, yes
I'll act as the heart to be the keeper
I'm staying here 'cause I've never been a leaper
Just keep in mind you keep things neater
I'll do the best I can to keep an even keel
Write you updates so you know this is real
Lest you know not when nothing feels good but when nothing feels
-----------
I've gotta stop this going to bed at an outrageous hour thing. It's not workin out too well. Remember to keep your bananas open and eyes peeled for more updates soon (because hopefully, for my sake, I'll stop being a stupid and update more).
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Full Circle
The name for this one is lame. I couldn't come up with anything better. But look on the bright side-- by the time you've checked in on this thing you'll have realized you got a twofer today!
Full Circle
The humidity's back and the heat's been on a while
It's been an arduous few months as if distaste is going out of style
The only pieces to have faded away are the ones that melted with season's change
But they're not gone, just a stowed disdain, and they'll be back in Autumn like a tetris game
They've fallen like hail in the midst of a nasty winter
Gouging at the porch relentlessly in an effort to keep my heart pounding
I just can't tell if these winds are blowing favors or testing sensors
Because the door's blown shut and calmness is drowning tonight
Dead leaves remind me of fallen stars
Fall from the sky, they fall so hard
Despite how much it happens I can never brace for impact
And afterward I can only look at where they tore through the clouds and what they left in tact
(It's not much, but it's still something)
Fresh breath stems from edges of Springs
And buoys through a falsely tacit ripple
Because the end that comes is the end that brings back the heat that stings
And I never thought coming full circle had to mean avoiding simple
Dealing with so much I've never dealt with before right now
I want September to come without a sound
Because the more we talk the more heat comes around
I'd rather act cool and not let it know; sweat it out
(It'll still be there but we'll be further away)
Sweat it out, sweat it out
Let it stand cold on my face
Because the more you whisper the less I shout
But you'll never know we live in the same seasons, or same state
(This is out of place)
You'll never know, you'll never see it, anyway
Full Circle
The humidity's back and the heat's been on a while
It's been an arduous few months as if distaste is going out of style
The only pieces to have faded away are the ones that melted with season's change
But they're not gone, just a stowed disdain, and they'll be back in Autumn like a tetris game
They've fallen like hail in the midst of a nasty winter
Gouging at the porch relentlessly in an effort to keep my heart pounding
I just can't tell if these winds are blowing favors or testing sensors
Because the door's blown shut and calmness is drowning tonight
Dead leaves remind me of fallen stars
Fall from the sky, they fall so hard
Despite how much it happens I can never brace for impact
And afterward I can only look at where they tore through the clouds and what they left in tact
(It's not much, but it's still something)
Fresh breath stems from edges of Springs
And buoys through a falsely tacit ripple
Because the end that comes is the end that brings back the heat that stings
And I never thought coming full circle had to mean avoiding simple
Dealing with so much I've never dealt with before right now
I want September to come without a sound
Because the more we talk the more heat comes around
I'd rather act cool and not let it know; sweat it out
(It'll still be there but we'll be further away)
Sweat it out, sweat it out
Let it stand cold on my face
Because the more you whisper the less I shout
But you'll never know we live in the same seasons, or same state
(This is out of place)
You'll never know, you'll never see it, anyway
Transit Moves
I've been on a Transit kick lately. The emotion they seem to successfully get across in their songs has been extremely impressive to me, because it seems really natural and honest. Though I try to write as honest as possible I think it's arguable that what I write is more explicit and specific to one thing than necessarily honest, even if true.
I know this, and it's hard for me to accept, because I don't like having a hard time with it. This one's me taking at shot at trying to be honest about the everything of a something, not just the something of a something. I don't know how well it'll come across, and maybe music would help, but this is all I've got.
Transit Moves
Get into my car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Sit, on my ass, because what's another night?
I'm tired, and finding my own faults is exhausting
I eat, sleep, breathe off "out of mind, out of sight" anyway
And laying down is easier than doing this thing
The pillow was cool but my head was hot
What do you want to know, aside from me eyes were bloodshot?
My deepest ambitions and fears?
How I want everything but can't find the right person to steer?
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
How about not trusting myself behind the wheel?
Or how I'm a better driver when this thing can't move?
Or how that's a bunch of bullshit and I just can't feel?
How it's not waking up when I pinch myself I loathe?
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Let it come as time to kill, but take the knife from my hand
Let bad blood spill; stain the ground and keep it in the plan
I swear it's gonna spell something out
Something more than nothing, something to tell myself about
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Tell myself I can do this
I've known the roads long enough to cruise them
Like bodies of water run into each other
Nothing short of miraculous but it happens every day
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Move on, get out, stay put, lay down
Time to make up my mind
'cause Push came to Shove tonight
He told him to knock it off, and didn't quite take it right
Made up my mind
I know this, and it's hard for me to accept, because I don't like having a hard time with it. This one's me taking at shot at trying to be honest about the everything of a something, not just the something of a something. I don't know how well it'll come across, and maybe music would help, but this is all I've got.
Transit Moves
Get into my car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Sit, on my ass, because what's another night?
I'm tired, and finding my own faults is exhausting
I eat, sleep, breathe off "out of mind, out of sight" anyway
And laying down is easier than doing this thing
The pillow was cool but my head was hot
What do you want to know, aside from me eyes were bloodshot?
My deepest ambitions and fears?
How I want everything but can't find the right person to steer?
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
How about not trusting myself behind the wheel?
Or how I'm a better driver when this thing can't move?
Or how that's a bunch of bullshit and I just can't feel?
How it's not waking up when I pinch myself I loathe?
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Let it come as time to kill, but take the knife from my hand
Let bad blood spill; stain the ground and keep it in the plan
I swear it's gonna spell something out
Something more than nothing, something to tell myself about
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Tell myself I can do this
I've known the roads long enough to cruise them
Like bodies of water run into each other
Nothing short of miraculous but it happens every day
Get into me car and drive away
Get out of my house with nowhere to stay
Run at breakneck to get to the future
Bypass the bullshit to get loose or
Move on, get out, stay put, lay down
Time to make up my mind
'cause Push came to Shove tonight
He told him to knock it off, and didn't quite take it right
Made up my mind
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Diplomat Day (Happy 4th)
Keys I know into my pocket--
quid pro quo for a new set in my palm
New weight, different buttons,
and where the CD player goes there was nothin'
Strange jams playing all day denoted more than music notes;
the only precipitation precipitating on an epitomical summer day
Decorating anticipation,
decidedly more floating than this trailer hitched on back
Frustrated by solutions,
(and) as freckles look me in my face
Answers to all the wrong questions, and I'm the one who gave them
This is all absolutely backwards, jug handles reverse you but can't take back words
(Off we go, off we are)
I heard strangers call your name a handful of times,
but you've heard stranger things 'cause you knew them all the same
Mental vulnerability, catastrophic calamity
Or maybe just a shaky day (too many lately)
A revolving door with linear lives,
Circling each other but in and out at different times
Do anything for half the opposite,
one way or the other
Do anything for a composite,
one way or another
quid pro quo for a new set in my palm
New weight, different buttons,
and where the CD player goes there was nothin'
Strange jams playing all day denoted more than music notes;
the only precipitation precipitating on an epitomical summer day
Decorating anticipation,
decidedly more floating than this trailer hitched on back
Frustrated by solutions,
(and) as freckles look me in my face
Answers to all the wrong questions, and I'm the one who gave them
This is all absolutely backwards, jug handles reverse you but can't take back words
(Off we go, off we are)
I heard strangers call your name a handful of times,
but you've heard stranger things 'cause you knew them all the same
Mental vulnerability, catastrophic calamity
Or maybe just a shaky day (too many lately)
A revolving door with linear lives,
Circling each other but in and out at different times
Do anything for half the opposite,
one way or the other
Do anything for a composite,
one way or another
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
I'd Rather Have a Thousand Bucks Than This Grand Statement
A broad, and perhaps unfair, generalization for taking lumps as they come. It makes a lot of sense in my head but I'm not sure the words are as rigid.
I'd Rather Have a Thousand Bucks Than This Grand Statement
A simple plan with complex details,
And for a wile it was all mine.
Flipsies with ellipses--
Off-center but curiously perfect in it's own right
Like a coin flip, but longer on the comeback.
You still know something's going to happen.
But it's the who what where when and why you can't justify,
So now even your anxiety's on the edge of its seat (damn these ellipses for being misshapen).
This is what brings season's change
A flick of the wrist and an unstoppable thumb
Break phantom calendar dates expected from misconceptions
Things in three aren't good guaranteed (just guaranteed)
Chiding glimmer, vim and vigor, young and limber, it doesn't matter, it's coming.
It's here.
I'd Rather Have a Thousand Bucks Than This Grand Statement
A simple plan with complex details,
And for a wile it was all mine.
Flipsies with ellipses--
Off-center but curiously perfect in it's own right
Like a coin flip, but longer on the comeback.
You still know something's going to happen.
But it's the who what where when and why you can't justify,
So now even your anxiety's on the edge of its seat (damn these ellipses for being misshapen).
This is what brings season's change
A flick of the wrist and an unstoppable thumb
Break phantom calendar dates expected from misconceptions
Things in three aren't good guaranteed (just guaranteed)
Chiding glimmer, vim and vigor, young and limber, it doesn't matter, it's coming.
It's here.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
This Morning's Storm
This one, probably obviously, came about from this morning's storm, which by all means was the most fantastic one around here in a long time (or that I can remember).
This Morning's Storm
The thunder shook the house,
The lightning lived up to its name,
I was hot under the covers,
But I stayed there all the same.
For a minute I was just as everything else
The in-sync harmony came abruptly
All and well, nothing to sell, no ringing bells
I was all right, alright; and it left with subtlety.
I didn't even notice,
But maybe I pushed it away, maybe I pushed myself a way,
Just thinking about some thing on this coast
And how they're-- well, forget about it...I'll leave it for another day.
My window's been open this whole time;
I'll leave it that way, too.
The sill's undoubtedly wet,
But it takes more than that to turn my cheeks sanguine.
I hate closing them,
Almost as much as I do with doors.
Sure, I can still see everything ok
But I can't discard how it permanently keeps everyone's feet on the floor.
This Morning's Storm
The thunder shook the house,
The lightning lived up to its name,
I was hot under the covers,
But I stayed there all the same.
For a minute I was just as everything else
The in-sync harmony came abruptly
All and well, nothing to sell, no ringing bells
I was all right, alright; and it left with subtlety.
I didn't even notice,
But maybe I pushed it away, maybe I pushed myself a way,
Just thinking about some thing on this coast
And how they're-- well, forget about it...I'll leave it for another day.
My window's been open this whole time;
I'll leave it that way, too.
The sill's undoubtedly wet,
But it takes more than that to turn my cheeks sanguine.
I hate closing them,
Almost as much as I do with doors.
Sure, I can still see everything ok
But I can't discard how it permanently keeps everyone's feet on the floor.
50% Familiar
Recent revelations led to this. I've been toying with the idea for a while. The syllables don't all match up, but I won't tell if you don't.
50% Familiar
I'm an average-sized tea pot
Middle height and underweight
Tip me over and pour me out
Watch the everything else come out in spades
When I get all steamed up, hear me shout
Watch the generalities on the outside just disintegrate
I'm an average-sized tea pot
Little change and lots of sense
Tip me over and pour me out
Watch for consistency and forget the first impressions
When I get all steamed up, hear me shout
Wait for the last line to teach you a lesson
---
I'm collecting a bunch of ideas for my short story. The problem is they're all in my head. Hopefully I buy a notebook for such things in the next couple days and start to get them to paper. Once that happens the story will start to come out and I'll be sure to update.
Keep your bananas open and your eyes peeled.
50% Familiar
I'm an average-sized tea pot
Middle height and underweight
Tip me over and pour me out
Watch the everything else come out in spades
When I get all steamed up, hear me shout
Watch the generalities on the outside just disintegrate
I'm an average-sized tea pot
Little change and lots of sense
Tip me over and pour me out
Watch for consistency and forget the first impressions
When I get all steamed up, hear me shout
Wait for the last line to teach you a lesson
---
I'm collecting a bunch of ideas for my short story. The problem is they're all in my head. Hopefully I buy a notebook for such things in the next couple days and start to get them to paper. Once that happens the story will start to come out and I'll be sure to update.
Keep your bananas open and your eyes peeled.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Short Story News
I've got an idea for a short story. It popped into my head the other night while at Friday's with Papa. It was something he said which will play into the overall story.
It involves perspectives I don't have, perspectives I wish I had, and perspectives I do have. I'm excited because my short story ideas have been few and far between (this is really only my second). I'm going to start it soon and hopefully it'll be done in the next couple weeks.
Stay tuned.
It involves perspectives I don't have, perspectives I wish I had, and perspectives I do have. I'm excited because my short story ideas have been few and far between (this is really only my second). I'm going to start it soon and hopefully it'll be done in the next couple weeks.
Stay tuned.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Medallion
I just got done spitting something out like two minutes ago. It all started by looking at a picture in my room. Here it is.
Medallion
600+ faces melt into one of this town
Down and out, it's only 50% at best now
A simple bout when you throw in the towel
To never again be here full time is a simple vowel
A medallion, maybe 8x6, is the most proof I've got
48 months squeezed between a bunch of grass and trees at a resort
4 to 8 months more and all those memories are a last resort
Used on a day caught between walls, exchanged for life support
Buoy up after bobbing down
Catch your breath, head on out
The front door's been waiting and your thoughts: disintegrating
So just get out before you see it all disappear
Here's some sticky tac so you can stick to the path
It'll defend you from a sick attack by that sycophant Grass
He wants to play you, stain your knees
But you know that's not you now; you know that's silly-- you wear jeans
Medallion
600+ faces melt into one of this town
Down and out, it's only 50% at best now
A simple bout when you throw in the towel
To never again be here full time is a simple vowel
A medallion, maybe 8x6, is the most proof I've got
48 months squeezed between a bunch of grass and trees at a resort
4 to 8 months more and all those memories are a last resort
Used on a day caught between walls, exchanged for life support
Buoy up after bobbing down
Catch your breath, head on out
The front door's been waiting and your thoughts: disintegrating
So just get out before you see it all disappear
Here's some sticky tac so you can stick to the path
It'll defend you from a sick attack by that sycophant Grass
He wants to play you, stain your knees
But you know that's not you now; you know that's silly-- you wear jeans
Traffic Jam
I just wrote this. None of what I've written lately (outside of the first line or so) has come out as anything more than a stream of consciousness. I don't know, maybe I'm trying too hard to do otherwise and what I churn out is my mind's way to spite me. Regardless, here it is.
Traffic jam in my head
But it's got the green light.
There's always that one guy--
Don't know how he got to the front of the line--
Where, to him, waiting is going.
He's holding everyone up
The rest are getting constrained,
And now engines are blowing.
Piston's pumped, skewed to the left; bearings everywhere
Drivers still sitting calm.
But soon they'll have to get out and walk,
Or they'll be stuck there forever
My merit always skips; I blame the ignition
It was stupid to buy on a payment plan
Each time thought climbs in I'm charged a grand
That's right, a contracted commission
Each time, a belligerent plan out the window
One less soldier, but what good's an arrow without a bow?
This traffic's getting out of hand
Time to take to guerilla, to go defend, defeat day's trend and move to the end
So, until then.
Traffic jam in my head
But it's got the green light.
There's always that one guy--
Don't know how he got to the front of the line--
Where, to him, waiting is going.
He's holding everyone up
The rest are getting constrained,
And now engines are blowing.
Piston's pumped, skewed to the left; bearings everywhere
Drivers still sitting calm.
But soon they'll have to get out and walk,
Or they'll be stuck there forever
My merit always skips; I blame the ignition
It was stupid to buy on a payment plan
Each time thought climbs in I'm charged a grand
That's right, a contracted commission
Each time, a belligerent plan out the window
One less soldier, but what good's an arrow without a bow?
This traffic's getting out of hand
Time to take to guerilla, to go defend, defeat day's trend and move to the end
So, until then.
Conditional
(originally posted Thursday, April 23, 2009 at 1:01am)
I've Done Better
Like a tree's leaves following Autumn's color code
Out of sync, out of sun, out of luck, it was a good run
In: the worst stage of survival mode
Not quite out: proving new true colors on the way to hit-the-ground fun
I like the way sand always holds your hand
I like the way the color pulls up lame but never bland
I like the memories we'll never have
And how the colors you've never shown let my memory make things grand
This past Fall was your Fall it's my flaw but from what I saw
I can't really put it on you unless your middle name is cement (because that's what broke the silence as I came down)
Remarks never relent and they can be re-lent but only without the pestilence
Carelessness, forgetfulness incite decadence before that anyway.
Treat Me Like Someone Else: where a tire swing's no simple thing
Where the Spirit's alive each time I make the drive
Where memory is everything because it stings to realize we've got no future (in common)
I'm cutting out the vestigial because I won't and don't feel it anyway, so get me the scalpel but forget the sutures (I'll be alright even if I start hobbling).
I've Done Better
Like a tree's leaves following Autumn's color code
Out of sync, out of sun, out of luck, it was a good run
In: the worst stage of survival mode
Not quite out: proving new true colors on the way to hit-the-ground fun
I like the way sand always holds your hand
I like the way the color pulls up lame but never bland
I like the memories we'll never have
And how the colors you've never shown let my memory make things grand
This past Fall was your Fall it's my flaw but from what I saw
I can't really put it on you unless your middle name is cement (because that's what broke the silence as I came down)
Remarks never relent and they can be re-lent but only without the pestilence
Carelessness, forgetfulness incite decadence before that anyway.
Treat Me Like Someone Else: where a tire swing's no simple thing
Where the Spirit's alive each time I make the drive
Where memory is everything because it stings to realize we've got no future (in common)
I'm cutting out the vestigial because I won't and don't feel it anyway, so get me the scalpel but forget the sutures (I'll be alright even if I start hobbling).
I Wish I Knew You Better
My problem with writing lately has been being able to get things to fall out of my head. I've got plenty to say, I just don't know how to get it to the paper. The end result is something I'm still ok with, something I still enjoy, but something that didn't necessarily start with an entirely original idea of my own. This one was different though.
(originally posted Monday, March 30, 2009 at 12:55am)
I Wish I Knew You Better
These homonyms and homophones present the present tense
Along with a mind vacated by an emptiness that doesn't even pay rent
Mutual "heys" but a not so mutual haze
And before it gets to long distance dissent it'll fade
Just as the memories in their heads sit in beautiful mental frames (one of a kind)
As they're covered in dust from the words they said
All the while remembering it like your worst memory
Dawn subsides to day as names become just names
And as they do, turn to the sink
Turn it on, let the water run over your hands
Denounce defeat, rinse, repeat
Rinse and repeat
(originally posted Monday, March 30, 2009 at 12:55am)
I Wish I Knew You Better
These homonyms and homophones present the present tense
Along with a mind vacated by an emptiness that doesn't even pay rent
Mutual "heys" but a not so mutual haze
And before it gets to long distance dissent it'll fade
Just as the memories in their heads sit in beautiful mental frames (one of a kind)
As they're covered in dust from the words they said
All the while remembering it like your worst memory
Dawn subsides to day as names become just names
And as they do, turn to the sink
Turn it on, let the water run over your hands
Denounce defeat, rinse, repeat
Rinse and repeat
For Leo, If Anyone
(originally posted Wednesday, March 25, 2009 at 12:52am)
For Leo, If Anyone
So it's been a couple days since I started to put two and two and you together. Now it's on paper, makes it official, proper, planned out, time to phase out sounds in my head. This is not hot air, but a cold unwelcome wind, that's found a spot to blend in, (where) no one mind's the same as mine at least not yours. We shine in each other's eyes but you're wearing sunglasses as I'm going blind. Even with no sight I('m able to) view you in real time, I know your type. All-in I bet. That sounds harsh; condescending and to assholery lending but don't worry it's not malicious nor vicious, (in fact) it's pseudo visceral at best. I'm just angry at myself, at this invisible mess, and I only want to beseech you to befriend me. Accommodate this, make it easy. Er, confusion, delusion, co-fusion, dilution, this can't be coming through clearly. Look-- I've put myself together backwards and just need you to turn me around.
For Leo, If Anyone
So it's been a couple days since I started to put two and two and you together. Now it's on paper, makes it official, proper, planned out, time to phase out sounds in my head. This is not hot air, but a cold unwelcome wind, that's found a spot to blend in, (where) no one mind's the same as mine at least not yours. We shine in each other's eyes but you're wearing sunglasses as I'm going blind. Even with no sight I('m able to) view you in real time, I know your type. All-in I bet. That sounds harsh; condescending and to assholery lending but don't worry it's not malicious nor vicious, (in fact) it's pseudo visceral at best. I'm just angry at myself, at this invisible mess, and I only want to beseech you to befriend me. Accommodate this, make it easy. Er, confusion, delusion, co-fusion, dilution, this can't be coming through clearly. Look-- I've put myself together backwards and just need you to turn me around.
Cast: (in order of appearance)
I posted a couple things on facebook over the course of the last few months. I'm going to re-post them here in the order I initially wrote them.
(originally posted Friday, December 19, 2008 at 1:06am )
Nausea
inspiration can be dashed so quickly
so quick it's quicker than it hit me
forgive forgery you're unaware of
fallout, turnabout, it's all for the best
what's being young without being reckless?
like a picture hung, but still so young
from a nail in the wall i'm having a ball
i've been framed not feigned and you'd think i'd be ok with that
but i'm without vision or self provision while vagrant and valiant
it's a talent i balance, this tumultuous valice
maybe it's just in my head
yeah, it's just in my head
oh what an understatement to discount my mental haven
after all it's all i've got
come next fall you'll still only be a call
there's nothing wrong with that but you'll still be nomadic
just like today and with today, well, quite frankly, i've had it
it's a nod and a sigh but don't get me wrong this isn't goodbye
flash back to now
for a second i got out and i did make up some ground
so maybe i'll go lay down
slip into sleep and get off my feet
it's been a long day, my mind's exhausted
i can't quite feel my heart's pace and I don't know what's caused it
when i wake up i'll again have lost what little grip i gained
when i wake up again it'll all revert back to today
(originally posted Friday, December 19, 2008 at 1:06am )
Nausea
inspiration can be dashed so quickly
so quick it's quicker than it hit me
forgive forgery you're unaware of
fallout, turnabout, it's all for the best
what's being young without being reckless?
like a picture hung, but still so young
from a nail in the wall i'm having a ball
i've been framed not feigned and you'd think i'd be ok with that
but i'm without vision or self provision while vagrant and valiant
it's a talent i balance, this tumultuous valice
maybe it's just in my head
yeah, it's just in my head
oh what an understatement to discount my mental haven
after all it's all i've got
come next fall you'll still only be a call
there's nothing wrong with that but you'll still be nomadic
just like today and with today, well, quite frankly, i've had it
it's a nod and a sigh but don't get me wrong this isn't goodbye
flash back to now
for a second i got out and i did make up some ground
so maybe i'll go lay down
slip into sleep and get off my feet
it's been a long day, my mind's exhausted
i can't quite feel my heart's pace and I don't know what's caused it
when i wake up i'll again have lost what little grip i gained
when i wake up again it'll all revert back to today
This Thing Goes Forever
This is going to be where I post all my creative stuff, for at least the time being.
If it ever stops it'll only be on here. It really will go on forever.
If it ever stops it'll only be on here. It really will go on forever.
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